How can I continue improving co-parent communication when I don't get along with the other parent?

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Answered by: Deborah, An Expert in the Parenting Questions Category
There are many reasons in which improving co-parent communication is difficult. Perhaps you don't get along, perhaps you live in different states, or perhaps there are multiple children involved who have busy extracurricular schedules or medical issues. Being a co-parent is difficult because you have to rely on another person who is no longer in your every day life to communicate with you. There are often items that need to be settled such as reimbursement of parenting costs outside of child support. Often, there is no accountability for those co-parents who don't provide necessary documentation, or who don't provide dates in a timely manner. The best tool that I have encountered for improving co-parent communication improvement is a product called "Our Family Wizard." This company provides a "safe" place to communicate with your co-parent. It provides every level of parenting communication you could need. Calendars for each child, an area for expenses to be recorded, a place to record important medical provider information, a place to provide school information, accounts for each child to be able to see content in which you grant them access to, accounts for professionals such as guardian ad-litem or attorneys, time stamps for when an item or communication is created-read-or sent, and most importantly the communication is an accountability tool because the items cannot be permanently deleted or altered in any way. The product is available for PC, MAC, and also has a mobile device application to make co-parenting communication easy even when you are away from your computer. The cost is less than $100 per year per parent. Many family courts now recommend this product to divorced parents especially initially following a divorce when emotions are still raw. This allows you to focus more on communication with the co-parent regarding the children rather than emotions towards each other. It also allows a transparent view into your child's schedule when they are not with you so that you may attend necessary functions and appointments without having to directly communicate with the other parent. In some cases, Our Family Wizard has been used as a tool in custody disputes as well as when dealing with a violent co-parent. Because it permanently records you and your co-parents communication with one another, there is a new level of accountability for both parents to be kind and forthcoming. While many divorced or otherwise separated co-parents can communicate well enough without help, this product provides a solution for those who have tried and cannot successfully communicate with a co-parent. It also provides a platform in which you, as co-parents, can communicate with your children together in such a way that the child will know that they are still important and loved very much by their parents. The true casualties in divorce or broken homes are the children. Communication is so important in the world in which we live today. The child often has to mediate for their parents and are burdened with having to be the communicator between the two. This will improve your relationship with your co-parent as well as your child(ren).



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