Being 19 I would know, what?

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Answered by: muneeza, An Expert in the Ages and Phases Category
Being 19 i would know that it is both terrific and maddening. I have been 19 for a year now (almost) and I've come to realize that this has been the hardest of my teen years.

There are more than one reasons to it and in this article I am going to discuss them. But before we go ahead let me just clear the air about my choice of topic to write on. Well its simple, I have been living the 19 year old's life for a year now and I think its fair to start from my territory.

Now being 19 I would know that it is the age of conflicts, for me atleast because of the fact that it was this very year that I had to make a few life-altering choices. And maybe, just maybe I might have goofed up a few.

The first big life-altering decision was of course, college. If you ever underestimated the extent to which college changes your life, then trust me you have never been so wrong.

For many college maybe be exciting and fulfilling but there are also a lot of people like me who don't particularly enjoy it. I had huge expectations out of college. Months before my classes first started, I had decided I would do this and do that, go here see this, and what not. But just weeks into college and the realization hit me that its not my thing. College is simply not my thing. Blame it on the stressful schedules, formal environment and the home sickness. At first I thought it will be all fine as time goes by but I was wrong. Things just kept getting worse.

Imagine this, you're sitting in class, the lecture is going on in full swing and for about half an hour now you have been trying hard to concentrate but you cant, you just cant. The only thing you end up doing the whole hour is just sit there numb and think. Think about the most depressing things in life. You start questioning yourself about where you are headed? What are you doing? Is this even worth it, going through all this torture for a degree, giving up happiness and joy? And suddenly before you know it you are close to a panic attack.

Yes, that is pretty much my life summed up in a 7 sentence paragraph.

But anyways not that I can do much about it, because college is not much of a choice for me anyways.

The next big thing that changed my life was moving out of my house. It is tiresome and highly stressful and you miss home. But it is highly liberating too. Apart from the few times you miss home, shifting out is all in all a good experience. The liberation is just thrilling.

Also Being 19! I got in and out of some really messy relationships which highly took a toll on me and I ended up becoming clinically depressed and finally decided to come back home and take some time off, anything to help really.

And after coming back home I've learnt some really important things, through hard thinking and introspection. The very first thing that I have learnt is that it is okay to have break downs every now and than, you're only human at the end of the day. Secondly, not expecting too much, it hurts, just stay minimal and embrace whatever life throws at you and last but hopefully not the least, you are your own saviour , no amount of medicines, therapy or treatment will help you if you do not wish to help yourself.

So hence, after half a year of struggle, I think I am finally feeling good again. Never had I felt this way before nor do I wish to, but the anxiety,sadness and stress have certainly made me value something that I never paid heed to before, being happy. Because I never knew how important being happy was until, I wasn't.

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